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Working on some Nanoha fanfiction

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Seraphil's picture
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It's been quite a while since I wrote fanfiction of any kind, but I've gotten a bit of a muse back.

The Nanoha story ideas I'm considering/working on:

- a oneshot about Nanoha dying in the 0068 incident, and Fate refusing to accept that reality; this story I've started writing
- a Super Robot Wars-esque story combining several Mahou Shoujo series into one world, primarily Nanoha, Madoka Magica, and Sailor Moon
- a Nanoha x Dragonball crossover that meshes the two worlds into one around the time of Nanoha A's and the Saiyan Saga; I particularly want to do this one
- a story where Due survives StrikerS and is still at large
- a story where Yuuno gets to be the main character for once, maybe about his archaeological adventures

Sansker's picture
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I do like the crossovers idea, wrote a couple myself, but mostly depends what you aim for. I dare say the Super Robot stuff or the Dragon Ball crossover sound best.

Seraphil's picture
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The Super Magic Wars idea I had written up is as such: in the Vivid time period, a great catastrophe brings Earth, Mid-childa and other worlds to ruin; an invincible force that the characters find impossible to overcome. The only way to prevent this future is to go back in time to stop it from ever happening, yet through a series of tragic events the only one who can go back is a weak mage. Her task is to find Nanoha and the other magic-users of the past(those from Madoka, Sailor Moon and possibly other series) in order to stop the foe that destroys the world before it becomes impossibly strong.

The NanohaxDBZ one would be a pretty straightforward fusion of the two worlds. Things like Nanoha being involved in the battle with the Saiyans, some of the Z-fighters getting involved in the Book of Darkness incident, new friendships arising, and both series' character developing in new ways due to their exposure to elements from the other series.

JinsenHo's picture
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"I do like the crossovers idea, wrote a couple myself, but mostly depends what you aim for. I dare say the Super Robot stuff or the Dragon Ball crossover sound best."

I also like crossover too. It seem nowadays so fond of crossovers, here's some example from games; "For Honor", "Pirates vs Knights vs Vikings", "Megaman Issues Comics" and etc.

I thought of this crossover idea of Irregular magic high school with Nanoha universe. Especially "Shiba Tatsuya" taught engineeres of TSAB of being more creative & enhancing in creating devices, and teach TSAB mages of using cast jamming; <Also included pseudo cast jamming that different waves interact with each other will neutralize their effects>, "Think like "+" combine with "-" then the result is neutral, thus no damage.", that also include using real combat experiences to teach mages and newcomers.

Shiba Tatsuya is Best CAD engineer for creating and inventing new theories and devices for his universe. So I imaging how will TSAB turn into when Shiba Tatsuya suddenly entered into Nanoha Verse.

Just think like Drifters suddenly entered into mysterious world before their death in their own real world. "Drifters Manga".

Strategy & Sciences are Foundation of Logic Principles. :P

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JinsenHo wrote:
"I do like the crossovers idea, wrote a couple myself, but mostly depends what you aim for. I dare say the Super Robot stuff or the Dragon Ball crossover sound best."
.

I will presume you are quoting me here. There is a button for that, on the right corner of the message, press it and you can make quotes appear a bit more properly

If Tatsuya got involve he would just single handily cure cancer, solve all issues with the technology, defeat the bad guys by staring at them and act all snub about it. So I do not recommend. Being serious I do like the one with time travel more than the others but I like that type of ideas. However it would live or die depending on who is the one send back

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The time traveler herself is an original character, a TSAB mage trained in Nanoha's instructor class and is part of her escort squad during the opening battle in the story.

Originally I toyed with the idea of using one of the Vivid girls like Einhart or Corona, but I felt Einhart would be way too strong. So I flipped back and forth with either Corona or an original character and decided on the original character since it'd make more sense for her to be in the right place at the right time rather than a full-on civilian like Corona.

Basically the opening scene involves one of the established characters(potentially either Teana or Nanoha herself) being the one chosen to go back in time 15 years. Our original character(possible name: Vectra) is part of the squad that's meant to escort our hero to an offsite transporter to rendezvous with a special operative only known to them as Hades, who has access to time travel powers that's been kept secret from all except a select few in the TSAB command. However, enroute to the rendezvous, the group is discovered by the entity destroying their world(possible name: The World Eater. An entity that was thought more myth than reality, with limited information known about them except they appear at times in history to bring ruin to worlds.) The battle quickly goes sour with most of the escort being wiped out, and our hero is mortally wounded. Making a last stand to buy time, she orders Vectra to go through the transporter in her stead.

Sansker's picture
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I see, not a bad idea but sometimes people don't like OCs taking over the role from the cast of the show. Not saying is a bad idea but it could easily make them too important and most of the time people go to fanfics to read adventures of the people from the show, not the authors original creations. The idea is quite good but I may recomend you reconsider using Vivio or Einhard instead of an OC. However if you feel the latter is the better choice then go right ahead

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No worries on that, Vectra isn't going to be the character the story revolves around; the cast is going to be rather large so I think it'd be detrimental to focus too much on any one character. Vectra's main role is to bring attention to the threat of the World Eater; after the opening scene, she's not even going to be part of the story until a bit later on. The outline I've got so far has the characters split into several groups the story follows - not unlike route splits in SRW - until later on when they join together to properly face the enemy groups. The first group is primarily around Nanoha herself, along with obviously Yuuno, and Kyoko from Madoka. The second group is the Sailor Senshi along with Vectra, and the final group is the Madoka cast. All three groups also have other characters joining their ranks later on in the story as the conflict grows and becomes more dire.

A bit of a spoiler alert, but the first dimensional quake that Nanoha and Fate cause ends up being a more significant problem in this story, as dimensional tears open doors to certain other worlds, where I'm planning to have characters(and their respective enemies) from other magical(and not-entirely-magical) series come from, mainly Strike Witches and Touhou, but potentially other series like Date A-Live, Slayers, Youjo Senki, Precure, etc.

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As long as you can keep the large cast and settings balance, then I say is a good way of going about it.

Seraphil's picture
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Balancing a large cast is definitely a challenge; one of my solutions is that several series will only have a couple characters involved due to being pulled through the dimensional tears. Another solution is Sailor Moon will mainly take place during the original season, as will Nanoha, so that also keeps the cast from getting too extreme.

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Still you are having plenty to work with already so try to keep some points of atention so people don't get distracted. An issue here could be that since you have so many, the main character isn't clear and that can somtimes hurt a story, since is harder to figure out who should we care about and why

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Moving on, as despite all this the Super Magic Wars story is probably not going to be the story I do first, rather the DragonballxNanoha one as I have a bit more stuff fleshed out for it, plus juggling two series is much simpler than four or more.

Right now my plan is to cover it in three main chunks; the first covers the fight with Raditz(which Nanoha and Yuuno get involved in,) the events of Nanoha A's(where certain Z Fighters get involved,) and the year of preparation for the arrival of the Saiyans. The second is the battle with Vegeta and Nappa + the TSAB hunting for Dr. Gero's lab, and the final arc covers Namek(which will end up going quite a bit differently since the Nanoha characters will be involved.)

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Sounds about right, but keep in mind one thing I always remember when I do crossovers: “If Frodo and Sam, in the Lord of the Rings, had manage to get lightsabers then Sauron would get himself a Death Star”

Meaning that if you are going to enhance the good guys with this combination, the bad guys must also be consider. Plus keep in mind that in Dragon Ball ki isn’t the same as magic, we do see magicians and other users of spells in that world but they stablish that the power the magicians wield is not ki base. So there is that to keep in mind as well

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Oh yes, and I have plans for that. Vegeta is gonna be no stranger to magic or the TSAB.

One problem I've had with some Nanoha crossovers is they make the Nanoha cast kinda infallible or invincible and have them fix all the "mistakes" with the other series or simply crush the opposition. That's not going to happen here; for example, Nanoha and Yuuno are going to have a rather rough time fighting Raditz(especially since they are still the first season versions,) even alongside Goku and Piccolo. And the fight with the Saiyan pair later will be disastrous, because Vegeta is no fool and comes prepared.

Of course, this also swings back around again, in that the Nanoha cast is now being introduced to a world that heavily uses Ki energy.

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I know what you mean. I once read a crossover between Nanoha and Sailor Moon. Not a bad concept but too heavily in favor of Nanoha at the cost of the Sailor Moon lore and characters. Not what I call a good idea.

Back to yours, I think you have the right path so just go ahead.

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If that's the White Devil of the Moon you're talking about, I think that's one of the only ones I liked, but it still had some flaws like reducing several of the Sailor Moon characters to one-dimensional jokes(like poor Luna) and having Nanoha be a little TOO wise about stuff, especially considering this is pre-StrikerS Nanoha. But it did have good moments, like the Senshi misidentifying Fate as a bad guy due to her black Senshi-esque outfit and way she kept them away from Nanoha, and Sailor Venus jumping in to help at the Takamachi wedding battle.

On to two other things; I've been thinking things over and I think I might go with your suggestion about the main character for the Magical Girls crossover. Rather than an original character, I'll use someone such as Corona, or even maybe one of the Numbers, as the main character. Partly because I was browsing Nanoha stories on Fanfiction.net and there's no fics at all about Corona, and very few about the Numbers. Along with someone else, which is my next thing.

There's so little fanfiction about Hayate when compared to Nanoha and Fate! And many of the ones with her as a major character is basically her tagging along with Nanoha and Fate in whatever plot they're getting involved in. I expected someone to have done the whole Magical Girl Lyrical Hayate thing where she has Raising Heart instead of the Tome of the Night Sky.

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To be fair, Hayate was never that well integrated in to the mix in the original show. But I can see your point.

Also yes, I think that was the one. I just didn't like how preachy and murder happy it went, one shooting Sailor Moon villains.

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So mostly what I've been doing is writing chapter/plot outlines and character details. Haven't actually started writing any of the stories quite yet, and I've put some other ideas down to paper that I also want to tackle.

1. A prequel story - like The Phantom Menace to the series - revolving around Precia Testarossa when she was still a young mage, and also covering things like Gil Graham's rise in the TSAB, the previous generations of the Harlaown and Nakajima families, and so on.
2. A more immediate prequel story, about how Yuuno and his clanmates found the jewel seeds, their meeting and interaction with the TSAB officer who they hand the seeds over to, the subsequent attack on the transport by Fate that scatters the seeds onto Earth, followed by Yuuno's battle with the first seed
3. Another Yuuno story, taking place between A's and StrikerS, detailing some of his side archaeological adventures. Some people liken him as a magical Indiana Jones, so I'm gonna run with that idea... and in the course of his adventure, he encounters a certain Dark Fragment from his past.
4. A sequel story to StrikerS, in a sense as an alternative to Force. The story centers on an older world in dimensional space, home to one of the largest orbital shipyards in known TSAB space which manufactures many ships used in Mid-Childa. Due to this powerful asset they have managed to keep their autonomy from Mid-Childa, in a sense only being a semi-administrated world. The conflict arises as long-rooted classism between magic-users and non-magic users cause unrest, as mages form the upper crust of society on this world. In recent years, non-magic users have risen up in pockets of rebellion and terrorism, and the conflict only worsens over time. The TSAB have sent an agent to this world to both observe and assist in dealing with this crisis. It's gonna be either Fate or Teana, have not decided yet but leaning more toward Teana.

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All of them sound like worthy ideas. I just warn against the Phastom Menace as a quality example. Plus the backstory of Presea and Graham seems rather unnecesary, both play influential roles with Fate and Hayate but their legacies lives on them.

The idea with Yuuno would work I feel for a short story. Really not much there to explore unless looking for some world building. Also I think this was an accident but I can be wrong.

This one I would not know. Not a Yuuno fan but if it works then go ahead.

Anything is better than Force. But yours sounds quite curious

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Regarding the last idea, this is the one I'm going full drive on right now. Currently just calling it Nanoha Rebellion as a work-in-progress name.

Backstory
---
Festus, a former world of the Ancient Belkan Empire, survived the Belkan wars and attained autonomy in a parallel fashion to Midchilda. The two planets soon became allies in the post-war era, neither wishing to reignite the flames of war as Midchilda focused on reuniting several other post-Belkan worlds and stabilizing, while Festus focused inward on developing it's mineral-rich resources and surviving Belkan industrial infrastructure, including the remains of an orbital shipyard. In record time, Festus became an economical powerhouse in dimensional space, controlling one of the primary sources for interdimensional ship travel. Thanks to this status, Festus continued on as a trade ally of Midchilda instead of falling under the protective umbrella of the TSAB.

Due to the lack of direct Midchildan influence, Festus grew in a largely Belkan-centric environment, complete with a feudal-type class system that favored magic users over non-magic users, aka null humans. Over the decades, bureaucracy and gradual corruption saw a divide form between the classes, as mages enjoyed the full benefits of Festus' booming economy while nulls simply didn't. It was not an overt dictatorial decision, but just comfortable neglect and rejection over time.

However, the simmering pot eventually boiled. Dissent and civil unrest became rampant in the suburbs and satellite towns. Talk of violence and even rebellion was heard. Efforts by the Guardsmen - the prominent peacekeeping forces of the ruling Margrave - hardened as such unrest was to be stamped out. In light of this, the TSAB have sent an Enforcer agent to assist the Festian leadership as a show of good faith.

The year is now 0080. In the northern city of Distral, two youths are about to find themselves pulled into the tides of war that have begun to break...
---

So in my mind, Belka is an equivalent of the real-life Holy Roman Empire, with its control over multiple sovereign nations(in this case, the various Belkan kings.) Festus was one such nation, a border world that managed to avoid most of the worst infighting in the core nations of the Belkan Empire. So now we have a successor state, that while it no longer calls itself Belka, is largely Belkan in nature.

Right now I have the story framework mostly done, set in three main arcs. The first arc is primarily focused on the new characters and introducing elements of Festus and groundwork for the incoming war. The second arc is when the Nanoha cast really start getting involved, and certain plot threads and conspiracies come to light. Everything will then culminate in the final arc where the differing ideologies and goals of the characters come to clash.

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The not holy, not roman and not empire, Holy Roman Empire. But is a fair way to see it a loose confederations of unique states under one banner that doesn't really do much. Explains its fall in to the Saint Kaiser Unification Wars.

Sounds a good foundation, but don't get too lost on the details. I do say seems possible base on the little lore we have on Belka from the show.

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Huh... looking back at what I structured out, I don't have any mention of the Wolkenritter. In a story so focused on a Belkan world, that seems like a huge miss. Time to rewrite!

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Not really, the Wolkenritter had lost their memories about their past lifes, only fragmented images remain. So they not having a connection with these group sounds fine. Heck they ignore the Saint Church and they are the closes Belkan-like people they have at hand